If my holiday plans were according to plan, I would already be breathing the air of Kota Kinabalu. While I was super upset that the trip had to be cancelled due to the damaging earthquake 2 months ago, I was relieved that I am grounded here back home, given that my body is throwing a tantrum. ☹
Backtracking to last weekend, I had clumsily fell while cycling and scrapped my leg against the pavement. So much for finally ending my "internship" and looking forward to the start of my official holiday. That, folks, is what happens to physically unfit + sleep deprived people when they do exercise. A note of advice? Stay home.
The following week saw me through being moody since I was home bound or basically bed/ chair bound with a defective limb and a body tattooed with another bout of hives. The scrapes became infected and my leg was just swollen. It just made me hate my own body more and in that instance, I could truly empathise with those living with limited mobility. I spent everyday slowly shuffling between my bed, the dining table, and the toilet. The highlight for each day was eating my meals. On days when I felt better and slightly confident of my mobility, I would bake/ cook with my brother and then end the sessions with a very swollen leg and serum oozing out of my wound from the extensive period of standing.
I wished I could proclaim that relying on God helps, but I was not faithful enough to do that. I wake up feeling pleasant and cheerful everyday and would be pulled back to reality the moment I step out of bed. At the instance when my feet touches the floor and give way, I sometimes wished that I fall forwards, banging my head against my desk/ floor, and then die there. Yet I always fell backwards back into my bed, leaving me yearning for time to slow down while my healing to quicken up. At the end, all I could do was to trust God to work in His own timing. I didn't pray for an instant healing; I prayed for my wound to be stabilised enough so that I could at least take the plane back to HK in minimal hassle. Which thank God, He granted my prayer.
My week-long loss in mobility was mostly 90% waste of my too short holiday. Spoilt kid mood aside, the whole ordeal got me to recognise the need of the less mobile and of course, those 三等公民 around us. How could they be engaged meanfully? Or rather, do they even want to be engaged by others in the first place?
*三等公民 - Can be translated as "third class citizen". However, the term can also be understood literally as "3 waits citizen". A term used in Hong Kong to depict those who are spending their lifetime waiting to eat, waiting to sleep, waiting to die.